Finding out that a mildly psychotic ex-girlfriend (or her friend, I’m not sure which) posted something ‘negative’ about me out on the Internet got me thinking. The beginning part of the rant expounded a little bit about how big of a dork I was/am. Beyond being amused at how a now-37 year old woman would resort to ‘OMGyou’resuchanerd!’ insult tactics, I started thinking about how all of the things that could potentially classify me under the ‘nerd’ or ‘dork’ category are the things helped me to get where I am now.

Let’s look at some of those things…

1. Chat rooms - When I worked at the computer lab at the College of Applied Science during my 1998-99 school days, you can imagine I wasn’t constantly busy. And so I spent some of my time in chatrooms and on bulletin boards (BBSs). While not necessarily considered the coolest thing in the world, I didn’t particularly care.

Chat applications and BBSs served as the jump for things like myspace, Facebook, Twitter and the myriad other social media appliacations.  What are they, if not glorified and steroidized versions of chatrooms and BBSs? And those sites/services happen to be all the rage right now in the interactive space. I’m of the opinion (as are a good number of other interactive professionals) that these will be THE places to market products/services/etc. to the majority of the world, whether that be through your typical online advertising (banners, fragments, etc.) or some other genius way. Hooray for me being on the boat early.

2. Star Wars - This particular insult I found pretty funny. She referred to me as a “Star Wars groupie”. Is that really considered an insult? I’m  pretty glad that someone would refer to me as that. Most of the coolest people I’ve met could be considered “Star Wars groupies”. Of course, I suppose that would depend upon your definition of what a “Star Wars groupie” is.  Whatever your definition, Star Wars is one of those things the whole world can relate to whether you love it, hate it, or are somewhere in between. I can’t tell you how many friends & business contacts I’ve made just by being able to relate to Star Wars, whether it be through the movies to the books that have come out to the video games.

3. Computer parts/hardware: Again, another one that is hilarious when trying to insult someone. A lot of college kids aren’t the luckiest in the sense of having to work at jobs that are kind of crap. I can’t think of a lot of people that really WANT to work the jobs they work in college. Therefore, I consider myself lucky to have found a place that would help me develop a skillset that, ultimately, made me more cash than a normal college kid would have and would get me a lot of places when I would start my career.

For example, by working at a computer shop, I was able to buy components at very low prices and then build computers for my friends and their friends. I’d make a nice profit off of it, and they would get a computer for a price that was very reasonable.

Working there also spawned a number of other secondary skills and interests. I know both Mac and PC operating systems pretty well. I picked up and learned a lot of the software I now use today (Visio, Dreamweaver, Photoshop, etc.). Most of all, it taught me how important it is to keep up with technology and think about how it can be used in a practical way. We call that consulting, friends…and there’s a lot of demand for (and a lot of money in) that.

4. Creating a blog/site ‘about myself’ makes me narcisitic: Beyond the fact that this blog isn’t necessarily ‘all about G’, it’s kind of idiotic to say that creating a blog is grounds for being categorized as some kind of social misfit. There are so many good things about creating a blog that it’s almost worthless for me to try and list them all. However, a few positive things would be that you’re taking the time to write…one of the most important skills (if not THE most important skill) you can develop. It allows you to learn to become familiar with a broad range of Web development princicples and practices…like open source; like design for the Web and how it integrates with the code on the back end;  like how to use a content management system. It can help you learn principles of SEO/SEM. These are all extremely important if you’re considering a career in the interactive/digital field.  And even if you’re not, it allows you to relate to a broader range of people.

Plus, aren’t the the majority of people out there creating blogs about themselves? Afterall, I don’t think there’s a subject that one generally would know better, right?

The point of this isn’t to sit here and justify who and what I am. I don’t feel a need to do that. Actually, the point is cliche…

It’s important to realize and understand that, as long as you’re doing something positive for yourself, you need to continue to do it. Be who you are no matter how someone might judge you, no matter how someone might manipulate you or what you’re doing into a negative light. If you spent half the amount of time doing the things you loved rather than fretting about being judged negatively over it, the world…your world…would be a much better place.

So…viva la dork, I say. It hasn’t hurt me much.  I have a great job, am surrounded by great people, and…most importantly…

I still ended up with a hot wife. And those of us that have it figured out know that 9 out of 10 men and women prefer dorks…

The best and earliest story I know about how important digital reputation management was/would become was the story of this guy from Cincinnati. He was this developer who decided that he wanted to rehab some theater in a really bad part of town there called Over the Rhine. City council cut him a nice big check and he took off. About a year later, a woman he was trying to date threw his name into Google and pulled up the fact that he was wanted. He got arrested and that was that. Damn funny.That was 5 years ago. Think about how far the Web has come since then in the sense of becoming a giant soapbox for whomever wants to say something about anything without having to ID themselves…effectively relieving them of any responsbility whatsoever.

I’m not saying that this is necessarily a bad thing; freedom of speech is very important. And keeping the Internet a place where speech can be exercised to its fullest extent is very important as well. It does open up a realm of possiblities though when it comes to what floats out there about you…and permanently for that matter.

There are now companies that have been created around the idea of digital reputation management and keeping it clean. I just read about one that charges $1500.00 a month to repair any damage, and that’s only to guarantee that the first page of results will come up clean. Given that it takes about 2-3 months for results to begin to change in the search engines, there’s at least 3-4K in your pockets beore its all said and done.

What’s really interesting is I don’t think our Generation Y friends quite get it yet that a good portion of them will most likely be the ones that actually grow those companies into real profitability. From a marketing perspective, there are studies that show Gen Y has this somewhat unhealthy obsession with the idea of fame on whatever level they can get it. One only has to take a look at myspace to see how crazy it can get.

Man…maybe I’m in the wrong business.

Let’s take me as an example. If I throw my name into Google, the first things that come up are the fact that I’m an interactive project/product manager and that I play music…

…and then something random about me being a weirdo and needing a life.  That has been a recent development, and one I brought down upon myself. Remember how I said something about how easy it is to throw things out there about anybody and anything? I did.  Specifically, I did it here on this blog. I wrote about a girl I used to date (and lived with) in college. Note that I’m going to avoid using her name here because I’ll draw more unnecessary results to her name and probably cause her to fly off into some kind of crazy rage which could potentially result in my physical demise…

Anyway…

So by creating that post about her, either she or one of her friends found it and decided to retalitate by writing some pretty funny stuff about me.

Let’s play a little Q&A now, shall we?

1. Andrew, did you spend time in Interwebz chat rooms?:  Yep. True. I worked in a computer lab at the College of Applied Science @ the University of Cincinnati. My spare time was spent chatting with other goofs who were fascinated with the internet. Good times.
2. Were you a Star Wars groupie?: I wouldn’t call myself a Star Wars groupie or anything…but I certainly dig Star Wars. Not ashamed, yo. The new Force Unleashed game is probably going to be my next game rental.  Ha!
3. Did you collect computer parts?: Yep. Previous to working in the computer lab, I worked for a place called Micro Direct where I sold and built computers during college. I made quite a bit of money, buying parts and building computers and then subsequently selling them to friends.
4. Do you still hold a grudge against this girl?: Nope. As a matter of fact, I couldn’t care a whole heck of a lot less. I genuinely and truly hope that she is having a good/better life than she had when I knew her. Beyond that…it doesn’t really register as a blip on my previous life radar.
5. Did you really post an “I Have No Life” revenge story about her?: Nope. But I did post a story about my time with her here. Someone else (her? her friend?) in her post called it a ‘revenge’ story. While most of my post about her is straight forward, I said a couple of more ‘kind’ things, like: “melissa was something else. she was older than me by five years. she was smart, confident and was one of the most talented and ambitious people in our program at school. the one thing i have to thank her for was that she gave me a little clout in my program, because as soon as i started dating her, the teachers all of a sudden started taking notice of me.” and, “but i don’t think i was sad about the fact that she was going to be out of my life. i was more sad that this talented, cool, attractive girl i had met almost two years earlier had taken such a terrible turn. it’s really awful to see a person self-destruct like that.” Note that I also removed her last name out of respect for privacy. I shouldn’t have used her last name. That’s really the only part I’m sorry about.
6. Does your wife wonder if you have old feelings for other women? Nope. Actually, my wife supports my writing. Some of the music & lyrics I’ve written reflect on or are directly about other women and heartbreak and all that typical stuff that makes up a good portion of music out there (stupid heartbroken musicians).
7. Did you create geochurn.com so you could “just…google [yourself] and get off on [your] self-created internet infamity [sic]: Infamity? Is that even a word. Well…to answer the question posed…nope. I didn’t really have to create this site to Google myself and have results come up. I’m just that cool that my name brings up some cool and amazing stuff without it. The funny thing is that geochurn doesn’t even COME UP as one of the first results. It’s on the second page of results.
   
8. Are you”disturbed and need to seek therapy”?  Nope. I mean…well…I’m disturbed by a lot of stuff, but certainly not ‘touched’ or anything like that, as the connotation of the word ‘disturbed’ is used here. I’m a sane dude.

I will tell you what is really disturbing though. At the bottom of her/her friend’s post it says something to the effect that Melissa is a very professional person and that she’s ignoring what that evil mean Andrew says. BUT, she’s going to show you a site that was created about me and how ‘creepy’ and awful I am. I can only assume that either her or her ‘friend’ created it.

Here’s the opening line, which is (I think) something to describe me:

“Dramaturgial = The term in its medical sense (usually referring to the evacuation of the “katamenia”, the menstrual fluid or other reproductive material.) literally: acceptance from the audience through manipulation, from the fact that one could create a way for others to suffer a worse fate than them was to his or herself a relief. It can also describe the effect of producing an outlet for violence, by acting as a form of release for violent behaviour. For example, in forms of media or in a dream.”

And then it goes on to describe how I’m ‘violent’, ’stalkerish’, and that I seduce 17 year old Norwegian girls in internet chat rooms for my own sick pleasures, make them break up with their boyfriends, and am scared of rejection or something like that.

Oh yes…and I was apparently almost 30 in 1999.

……..

Holy sweet mother of all that is good and awesome, Batman.

First of all…I have to congratulate whichever person took the task on of taking the time to create that site. I’m kind of flattered that I, Andrew Joseph Geonetta, could rile someone up so much that they’d create a little shrine to me (as crazy as that shrine may be).

And I also have to congratulate whichever person actually conjured up that stuff about the Norwegian girl. It’s kind of creative and funny in the same way one might think the banjo player in ‘Deliverance’ is creative and funny…

The real (summarized) story is as follows:

1. I talked to a Norwegian girl in a chatroom and over e-mail…10 years ago. She was really cool.  I guess you could call it a pen pal thing. I was talking about going to visit a friend in Germany at that point and remember saying something like, “Hey, it would be cool if it were possible to do some travelling while I’m in Europe and somehow could come visit in the Netherlands.” She sent me a packet of stuff that had things like recipes of traditional Norwegian food, some pics of her and where she lived, a map of her town, and a letter.  I know there was more, but I don’t have it because…
2. Melissa took it from me. It was really sad.
3. After that, I don’t know what happened, but all of a sudden, this really cool girl couldn’t talk to me any more because her boyfriend (who I knew about…she lived with him, for God’s sake) all of a sudden decided that his girlfriend and me were “more than just friends”.  Because…you know…that makes sense. The only thing I can guess is that my fun-loving girl Melissa must have mailed something? E-mailed?  Called? this guy, telling him something terrible.  I honestly don’t know for sure though; just a theory.

I lost a friend out of it, and that really sucked.

So…digital reputation management, friends…make sure yours is clean and spotless. Me…I don’t think I’ll do anything about either of those sites. They are both pretty entertaining and defiitely make for good conversation.

Little known fact:  John McCain actually invented the device we have all come to know/love/hate as the Blackberry.

Surely you jest, Andrew. SURELY, right?

Friends, I JEST YOU NOT. Just as Al Gore invented the Intarwebz, Johnny Mack rocked the future of telecomms with his genius Blackberry invention.

OK…so I jest you a little.

This is pretty funny.

I have three little words for that one.

WTF. And maybe a 4th.  Mate.

A little while back, Mr. McCain and Mr. Obama made appearances at the Saddleback Church in California. One of the questions was something like ‘define rich for the purposes of taxation’.

The question wasn’t that dificult.

Obama answered pretty succinctly in my opinion. If you’re making $150K+ as a family, you’re considered middle class. If you’re making$250K and above (as a family), you are in the top 3-4% in this country, and you would be considered ‘rich’.

Now…I don’t know exactly where those numbers came from or what they are based on. There are a lot of things that would need to be taken into consideration…where you live in the US, how many children you have, etc. But that sounds about right to me. $250K…for the average family of 2 adults and 2 children…no matter where you live in country (in my humble opinion) is a hell of a lot of cash to be pulling down. Depending on where you live, $150K a year for a family is STILL pretty damn great!

And then John McCain answers the question. He started off by not answering the question. He talked around it, stating that ’some of the richest people he knows are unhappy’ and ‘ rich should be defined by other criteria other than just cash’ etc.

Then…finally…he answers with, ‘I think if you’re talking about income, how about $5 million?’

Huh? $5 MILLION is the number you use to define someone who’s rich in America? That’s the criteria by which you are selected to pay into a higher tax bracket?!

Let’s put this in perspective. Less than 1/10th of 1% of people in the US make 5 million a year. So how is that even remotely in touch with the average American?

So basically what J McC is saying is this: If you make less than 5 million a year, you get to bear the burden of the taxes in this country.  And above that, you get to pay a extra………………

This makes absolutely no sense to me.

Metallica…let me tell you the story of how I started listening to them back in the day. It’s entertaining and will give you a little perspective on my general opinion of them.

When I first heard of Metallica, it was back around 7th grade or so. I saw the album cover for ‘Kill ‘em All’ and I thought, “Gee…that’s scary.  They are probably devil worshiphers.” And that was it. I never listened to them.  I had no desire.  Of course, that was around the time my musical tastes resembled something like a single celled organism swimming around in protoplasmic glop.  But hey, we’re talking about a 13 year old kid, so you can’t expect highly evolved music tastes quite yet.

My next experience with Metallica was my freshman year in highschool. I was in a pre-algebra class, and this dude named Tim used to sit behind me and jam out to Metallica. Every. Day. He had a sweet mullet. He used to give me this super-creepy gap-toothed smile and say things like, “Dude…I hate math. But Metallica makes it better. Here man. You should check this shit out.”

And so I apprehensively threw on the headphones and was immediately assaulted by blistering riffs from “Ride the Lightning”.  My young, fragile Rush-soaked brain couldn’t quite take it. 10 seconds in, I withdrew the headphones from my head, looked at Tim and was like, “That’s really loud. And it’s too fast. And the guy is just screaming. How can you listen to that?”  He just smiled said, “Weak,” and put his headphones back on and gave me a a little close-eyed head bang.

The third time I heard Metallica, it was my sophomore year.  1991-1992, and that was when the black album came out.  I had heard Enter Sandman on the radio, and I was thinking that it was pretty cool. Of course, at this point I was full-on into grunge, and I was still thinking that perhaps Metallica was of Satan. But the black album seemed to resonate with more more specifically because the songs were a little slower and crunchier.  And it was pretty musical. So you could say that I got into Metallica at the point where a lot of people felt like they sold out. Fine. Whatever. But seriously….there are some absolutely rocking songs on the black album…specifically Sad But True, Wherever I May Roam, Enter Sandman, and The God That Failed.  And it’s produced extremely well. It definitely put Metallica on the map for a larger audience that couldn’t quite swallow the full-on thrash of the previous albums.

So I started there, and then I went backward. I went to Master of Puppets first, and found myself getting turned on by not only the extreme ferocity of the music and the lyrical content, but also by the fact that these guys were actually really, really good musicians. And that was important to me at that point in my life because I had just flat-out stopped playing baseball and was nose diving directly into band, choir, musicals, etc. at school.

Then I listened to …And Justice for All.  At that point I decided that I actually really dug Metallica. I loved grunge more…but Metallica was well respected in my book.

I was pretty happy with Metallica until Load came out…which is where the suck factor increased exponentially. What the hell happened? And then it was kind of like they tried to reaffirm their place by releasing Reload…trying to convince me that the new sound was kosher…and that was even worse. By the time St. Anger came out, they weren’t even the same band. They hopped on the ‘I’m going to downtune my guitar as far as it will go. And I’m going to be like Korn.  But I want to sing a little bit. And lets not have any solos because solos aren’t popular anymore. I’d also like to sound way overproduced.  And I want to suck.  Yes. I want to suck and not sound anything like I’ve tried in the past.”

I think I maybe listened to all three of those albums for a combined total of 30 minutes.

And now we get to Death Magnetic. Let me caveat this with the fact that my musical tastes have evolved quite a bit since those past three albums have come out. I’m not quite the angry musical angst loving fan I used to be. That said, let’s chat a little bit about where this album is in the spectrum of Metallica…

The good part is that it’s a step in the right direction for them. We’re back to these 7+ minute long opuses with multiple parts and some pretty good guitar riffs. James Hetfield has some of the best rhythm guitar chops ever created. And the addition of Robert Trujillo is welcome. He’s easily as nimble as Hetfield is on guitar, but I think he lacks the musicality of of Jason Newstead or the late Cliff Burton.  There are a few standout songs on there, those being The Judas Kiss, Cyanide, Suicide & Redemption, Broken, Beat & Scared, and All Nightmare Long.  You could say My Apocalypse is pretty good too, sounding like it was something that could’ve come off Ride the Lightning.

So 5.5 - 6 out of 10…mmm…not bad.  But overall…it’s not great, and there are so many reasons why.

One of the things that made Metallica the band it is is the fact that each musician contributed equally. All of the guys have chops and know how to work together. I’m not real sure what happened, but Lars Ulrich has pretty much gone to holy hell.  There is something…off…about his overall performance. It sounds like he’s struggling, really trying hard, to keep up with everyone. And maybe he is; he’s in his 40s and he’s attempting to play some pretty blistering stuff on the drums.

But the most dissappointing, the one I’m most let down by, is Kirk Hammett. This guy used to write guitar solos that people can sing. They were such an essential part of the Metallica experience. On St. Anger, the album was devoid of KH solos. This album brings them back…but they are soulless. Its sounds like there was no thought put into them. Half the time they either don’t quite fit, or they’re just sloppy. My friend Tom said it best when he said that there are a lot of notes being played, but he can’t remember much about them.

There is a lack of cohesion of the songs. If you listen to Metallica of the past, you’ll notice something of a theme throughout all of them.  It’s not necessarily a ‘progressive’ approach, but at least there’s a running idea throughout the album. This album tries to do that, but I feel like it fails. There’s a story there, but its not immediately apparent. A lot of it is cliche and hard to take as a whole.  And the lyrics…wow…some of them are just flat out terrible.  Prime example would be, “Love is a four letter word…”……..

But the main reason why the album isn’t great is because it all sounds about the same…not only from the perspective that the album itself sounds the same from song-to-song, but it sounds like they were trying to dig up the old vestiges or something they did in the past. I get that. They are trying to show they stlll have it, and that’s important to do considering how horrible the last three albums have been.  But they did it better in the past, and that makes me sad.

It’s so hard to walk the line of doing something new and innovative and musically fresh while making sure that enough of the sound you created remains intact. Unfortunately, Metallica hasn’t done a great job of that with Death Magnetic.

They apparently recorded about 25 songs, so I’d expect a B-side to come out here within the next year.  Let’s hope that if those tunes ever get released that they are a little more raw and edgy than what has just been released…