system: xbox 360
one sentence description: army of two…….tough guys named ‘tyson’ and ‘elliot’ who blow things up and rock……but have a secret crush on each other in the third person perspective.
graphics: 9 | sound: 6 | playability: 7 | challenge: 6 | value: 7 | bias: 7
total: 7
the low-down
my hopes were really high for this game. i watched the developer videos while it was being polished up and it seemed like a pretty promising fun & unique idea. in practiciality, the game seems just…well…OK. the dissappointing thing is that the game seems to have all of the right elements there…two tough guy army characters, black-ops intrigue, cool customizable weaponry & body armor, an awesome co-op mechanic and a decent (but throw away for the most part) story line.
but something is missing, and that something is keeping all of these elements from forming a cohesive package. for a game that is supposed to be super action packed, it doesn’t seem like the overall experience quite reaches any level of high excitement.
you have these two tough guy army characters…one of whom talks in a somewhat annoying (and kind of borderline effeminate) voice and calls his partner, who is named ‘tyson’, ‘tys’ (as in ‘tice’. ‘help me out, tys!’ ‘come on and cover me, tys!’ ’save me, tys!’.
black ops intrigue…but it’s so heavy handed that it just doesn’t feel cool. there’s a cut scene where your ‘boss’ is telling you in this really abrasive tone, ‘…and remember boys, when you come out of this, it never happened….’ ooooo! scary!
cool customizable weaponry…that sounds like a freakin’ pop gun. i mean, i have this sweet large machine gun that barely registers as something akin to a pop cap through my stereo. and my tough action hero heaves this thing…with one hand…over his cover, firing blindly, and generally hits what he’s aiming at. huh?
an awesome co-op mechanic based on the idea of aggro (i.e. your partner or you draws fire while the other guy goes stealthy-like and takes people out)…but DAMN your partner AI is stoooopid when you’re playing single player. he has a real hard time keeping and controlling the aggro…which i suppose is to be expected…except for the fact that this is what the game sells itself on…
a decent storyline…but it doesn’t make a lot of sense how it goes from the beginning, where you’re good ol’ army rangers, to ‘army of two’ mercenaries. sweet.
and not that there’s anything wrong with manlove, but this one has quite a few undertones of a little more than a friendly swat on the ass or a punch in the shoulder. these dudes parachute into hot zones together…as in they are attached to the same chute and one guy is holding the other. they do goofy things like ‘play air guitar together’ after ’something awesome’ happens…or they playfully knock each other around when ’something bad’ happens. they ‘cover’ each other, and say things like, ‘i can’t take it anymore, elliott!’ or ‘cover me, tys!’ seriously…there’s nothing that screams ‘game of the year for the closet homosexual army man’ louder than some of the things happening in this thing.
all of the above said, i still like the game…for the most part.
i can tell i’m probably not going to play all the way through it, but i know that i’ll have a little fun. thankfully, i just borrowed this game. i absolutely wouldn’t buy it…not even used. it’s worth a rental, i think, but even that is borderline because there are PLENTY of other higher quality rentals than this one.
pros
- graphics are nice and fluid. the cut scenes are well done.
- large array of customizable weaponry
- pretty cool story (so far…)
- has potential to be a lot of fun with another person
cons
- not that exciting for an action shooter
- characters are a little bit stupid
- repetitive in-game dialogue
- sound design isn’t that great
- “pimped” weaponry looks lame
- when too many objects are on the screen, framerate starts to go
- “
